"a caterpillar doesn't just grow into a butterfly. a caterpillar must undergo metamorphosis, and a cocoon is where a caterpillar risks it all: enters total chaos, undergoes total rebuilding, and is born to a new way of living. only in taking the risk of entering that inert cocoon can the caterpillar go from dormancy to potency, from ugliness to beauty."

Monday, February 07, 2005

go fast, go slow

i'd like to believe i was born with the thing for speed.

although i don't like it when my bro or my pop drive beyond 60 kph, i dream of being able to drive very, very fast (hahaha! i know i'm being unfair). i often experience adrenaline rush, be it because i'm watching a race, or simply because i'm just thinking of things going on in a flash...

on walking...
compared to most people, my average walking speed is fast and would probably enable me to outpace the slowest runner. it's not just because i currently live in a place where everything seems to be moving so fast. i've always had that walking speed. of course, when people i walk with don't get to enjoy my pace, i end up walking slow... but whether i walk fast or slow, i enjoy walking especially when i get to see natural greens.

on eating and drinking...
i eat fast, too. unlike my cinema buddy who prefers to eat as if she has aaaaaaaalll the time in the world, i prefer making my food disappear right away. same goes for my drinks, be they water, juice, milk, or alcohol. i like to empty the glass (or the bottle) in a single tipping. i only go slow when something disturbs me.

on talking...
i know i could never beat my friend miez when it comes to talking speed, but my pop says i'm one of those people with mouths that have the tendency to go like a loaded machine gun, hahaha! truth be told, i don't do it consciously. most times, i don't get to notice how fast i'm talking until someone tells me to slow down lest i drain all my energy talking.

on typing...
i don't know whether it's a product of too many chat sessions or too many reports, but i know my average typing speed is fast; sometimes, i fear i might end up splitting the keyboard into two. i only go slow when i want to really digest what i'm typing or when something in my brain alerts me of a probable grammatical or logical lapse.

on writing and reading...
i experience moments when i suddenly feel the urge to wield the pen with my left hand and write as if tomorrow never comes. those same moments are when i make my hand race after the seemingly gazillion thoughts a-zooming in my head, and thus the need to write fast lest my thoughts go poof! i don't like it when i write really, really fast though because my usually nice handwriting gets to suffer. i prefer to see my words written neatly and nicely.

as for reading... when left to my own, i could read 3-5 books (from cover to cover) in a single day. i used to really read a lot that i learned to develop my own version of speedreading. these days, i don't get to read books that much (life is cruel! life is cruel!), but when i do read, i have the tendency to read as fast as i could.

there are things that i enjoy doing slow though, and they are:

getting out of bed...
my body clock normally allows me to wake up at 6am, but i don't get out of bed right away. instead, i stay under the sheets for two hours or more, either sleeping some more or simply trying to sleep some more. gone were the days when i would get up right away, almost bouncing off the bed, forcing my body to move. now, when i get up, i do it as lazily as i could, treating the act of leaving the bed as art.

taking a bath...
i used to be able to get myself ready in 15 minutes flat. but now? nah. i revel in taking a bath slowwwwwwwly. there is no way i can be done in 15 minutes.

combing my hair...
i love combing my hair now as much as i like running my hand through it, and i try to do so as slowly as i could because i want to avoid breakage. there's something wrong with my hair's strength. :(

artwork...
when it comes to drawing or painting, i prefer taking my time. doing art is something i really love to do in my own time, without deadlines, without ultimatums. when it comes to artwork, i don't want to be rushed by myself or by anyone.

going through arrays of books at book shops...
a friend once said that i should not be allowed to enter a book shop if time is of essence. going through books really takes up my time, especially since i prefer doing it slow. i could spend hours looking at covers of books, reading gists, scanning pages (if allowed), appreciating titles, thinking of buying... and usually, i end up not buying. i just purposefully spend time with the books, as if they're breathing. hehehe.

-¤-

speed got me when i was just a kid. i wasn't 5 years old then when i got dragged by a fast-moving motorcycle. why? because i thought i could run as fast as the motorcycle!

the story...
a motorcycle was up for sale and my uncle was set to run it for a test drive. my young mind saw that as an opportunity for adventure. the people surrounding me were too busy looking at the motorcycle that they didn't notice that i managed to make my way through them to hold the metal part of the motorcycle's backseat with my hands. they only realized i was there when the motorcycle was already accelerating to top speed, and they saw poor little me almost flying from being dragged. needless to say, it was already too late when i realized my folly, that my little legs couldn't keep up. when i let go of my hold, i ended up hitting the ground so hard, and too shocked to cry at first. i know i gave my parents (and all the people who were there) the shock, too. i remember being immediately brought to the hospital for fear that i broke a bone or badly knocked my head. fortunately, and even though there were tiny pieces of broken glass on the area where i landed, i only got very nasty-looking abrasions on my two knees and some on my hands. for years after that, i sported scars on my knees -- scars that resemble the map of the north and south american continents. to this day, you can still see them on my knees, but you have to look very closely because they've already become very, very faint.

5 comments:

  1. great post!

    personally, I...

    walk fast (though getting slower), eat slow, drink fast, talk, type, read, and write slow, get out of bed SLOW, bath fast (used to be slow), paint fast, shop for books (and especially wine) slow.

    It's funny the things that change as you age, isn't it...

    originally posted on 02.08.05 - 12:53 am using Haloscan comment board

    ReplyDelete
  2. nakakatawa pero habang binabasa ko entry mo na ito... nagmamadali din ako.

    gud am.

    originally posted on 02.08.05 - 7:32 am using Haloscan comment board

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  3. ako naman... i walk really fast (especially when i'm alone). having grown up in msu, sus, kinahanglan paspas mulakaw! pero gakahinay na karon. i eat slow (except kung french fries or junk food ang ginakaon), drink fast, talk in normal speed, type really slow, write quite fast, read in normal speed (i don't reading too fast kay murag di ko ka-appreciate sa words, sayangan ko), i get out of bed really slow (lazy person is what i am!), i used to take a bath really slow (would take me 45-60 minutes), but now, i take a bath fast (around 15 minutes tops), i comb my hair fast, i don't do artwork (was talent), and when i'm at bookstores or libararies, i'd really need to literally drag myself away from the books because if i gave in to what i really want, i'd stay in the bookstore or library for the rest of my life and i'll be happy!

    originally posted on 02.08.05 - 11:12 am using Haloscan comment board

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  4. grabe mn jd kag mga ma think oi, hehehe!

    originally posted on 02.08.05 - 2:28 pm using Haloscan comment board

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  5. mark, tsutsugamushi, BabyPink, Lanee, thanks a lot for the comments.

    i'm currently making a conscious effort to eat slow.

    if i like a book and i'm reading it the second time around, i also make conscious effort to go slow. under normal circumstances though, i really go through reading materials fast.

    tsutsugamushi, kaya ka siguro nagmamadali kasi kung harap-harapang kwentuhan 'to, mabilis ang delivery ko.

    hahaha. gusto kong maniwala na ang choice of words ko ay nakakaimpluwensiya sa reading pace ng bumabasa.

    originally posted on 02.15.05 - 10:36 pm using Haloscan comment board

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