"a caterpillar doesn't just grow into a butterfly. a caterpillar must undergo metamorphosis, and a cocoon is where a caterpillar risks it all: enters total chaos, undergoes total rebuilding, and is born to a new way of living. only in taking the risk of entering that inert cocoon can the caterpillar go from dormancy to potency, from ugliness to beauty."

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

challenge: reveal the hidden message

"Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius - and a lot of courage - to move in the opposite direction."
--E.F. Schumacher

it's meant to be cracked.

hint: it's in english!

top layer: 15 3 26 26 12 8 25 26 25 8 25 12 21 15 26 21 13 25 10 13 10 4 7 7 20 7 21 25 7 10 15 4 15 15 22 13 10 2 7 10 2 10 23 21 1 12 9 2 11 12 13 10 26 18 18 13 12 1 26 25 2 13 16

bottom layer: 25 13 8 3 7 15 23 25 7 15 10 22 7 25 21 12 15 11 12 7 14 8 23 7 3 21 7 3 15 10 23 21 3 12 12 15 3 5 15 25 12 15 4 7 14 15 22 14 2 12 15 9 8 2 18 26 26 8 15 22 14 26 7

here's the surefire way to decipher this...
divide and conquer. mark all the up's-and-down's. be number-free. always choose right. be willing to go through all the up's-and-down's. simplicity is key. feel good. share.

the solution guide sounds like unsolicited advice on how to go through life, huh?

pen and paper would be useful, too.

Saturday, March 24, 2007

what do you collect?

"Look at this trove, treasures untold
How many wonders can one cavern hold?"

-- The Little Mermaid

i collect...

books. i love books. i adore good reads. i collect them. i like owning them. i check out book shops even in unlikely nooks and corners just to find the books i want to add to my collection. it's my dream to have my own library. i already have a mini one. i have 200+ books to date and i'm still keen on acquiring more.

piled up to the ceiling: how come there's no more space?

lest you think i only stack 'em up for mere display, let me say for the record that i do read them. see, i like reading. no, not like, love. i love reading. i can forego eating, drinking water, sleeping, and going to the cr when i'm soooo into finishing a good read. i can be so obsessive when it comes to reading and books. i sometimes think that it's not me who owns my books. it's probably the other way around -- my books own me.

i intend to add more comic books to my collection. i dig those works by filipino graphic book artists. i also want to own those pcij books, too... and more of calvin and hobbes!!!


they all come with stickers. they're not pirated.

postage stamps. during my elementary years, i was into philately -- collecting stamps. aside from reading, collecting stamps was my way of discovering and appreciating other countries.

i only managed to put a few of them in an album. most of them stamps i kept in envelopes and i still have to mount them. now, there's something for my to do list. i have to keep that in mind.

i re-discovered my old stamp collection two weeks ago while i was looking for my 'still-missing-in-action' unicorn cross-stitch pattern.

stationery. i've been collecting stationery since grade school. scented ones, colorful ones, simple ones, small ones, big ones, medium-sized ones, those with people and those without, nicely illustrated ones... i have them in various colors, shapes and sizes. i also have a collection of hotel stationery. i keep a lot of them in a stationery holder i designed myself. some of them i already transferred to a clear book for easy viewing.

some of the sheets in this collection are more than 15 years old

even back then, i knew i won't be writing on them. i only wanted to collect them... and the ones i have in duplicate, i'd be willing to trade with what other stationery collectors have in duplicate -- just like what we girls used to do in grade school.

key holders. i dig key holders but since i don't have many keys to call my own, i don't usually use most of them. i simply collect them. sometimes, i use them to adorn my bags... but most times, they're just hidden somewhere. i treasure them because a lot of them are gifts/pasalubong from my friends.

key holders minus the keys

when i left home for my graduate studies, my younger sisters didn't know what to do with the pile of key holders i left behind so they pushed pins on the wooden panel in the girls' room and displayed them there.

the ones that are still inside the packs are reserved for future cars, future houses, and future whatever. hehe.

stickers. a lot of the stickers in my collection date back to my elementary years and were given to me by my classmates and friends.

what will i do with them? just keep them.

trinkets. dangling earrings and hoop earrings. chokers. necklaces with weird-looking pendants. bracelets and bands. hair accessories. i have those.

the dangling and hoop earrings? i won't survive wearing them. i simply collect them. no, i'd like to think that i buy them para pang-asar, as one of my friends put it. i prefer wearing simple studs.

candy wrappers. back in college, one of my classmates kept lots of coins in his backpack's pocket. his bag was always heavy but it was never because of books. it was always because of his coins. as for me, i kept lots of candy wrappers in my backpack's pocket. they weren't heavy to carry around but they were really many. kanya-kanyang ka-weirdo-han.

...and you know what? it's been four years since i left college but the said candy wrappers have not found their way to any of the trash bins yet.

yes, the candy wrappers are still with me. no, not really. they're inside one of the bags i no longer use. i put them there because, while i no longer want to carry them around, i don't want to really part with them yet. memories, you know. i figure i'll make a throw pillow and stuff them candy wrappers in it.

aha, another addition to my to do list.

i also collect unused disposable table napkins from food shops and restos (i usually make my friends sign them -- the disposable table napkins, not the shops/restos), letters and greeting cards (even those from people i don't like), travel brochures (for scrapbooking purposes and future travels), quotes (why do you think i keep posting quotes?), travel tickets (for scrapbooking purposes, too), gift wrappers, art materials (i pile 'em up first before i put my heart into using them), souvenir shirts (wherever i go, i have to have a shirt from that place), movie/concert tickets (that is if they find their way back into my hands), coins, event IDs/name tags, and colorful socks.

i collect nothing and everything. teddy bears, too.

Wednesday, March 21, 2007


"We must remain as close to the flowers, the grass, and the butterflies as the child is who is not yet so much taller than they are... Whoever would partake of all good things must understand how to be small at times."
--Friedrich Nietzsche

remember high school? it was fun!

sometime in march 1999, we went to ditucalan for choir practice. what choir practice? we went to a place where the roads were good for biking and the playground had swings, see-saws, slides, and nice green grass. the day was meant for having fun and the place was right. yoni climbed up a slide and took this picture of us -- rho99 during a pre-graduation class bonding... in ditucalan.

despite its distance from the city proper of iligan, ids99's sci-curr people loved having practice sessions (for basketball, for filipino drama, etc.) in ditucalan. not only did we find the place nice and conducive for spur-of-the-moment adventures, our classmates from there're also very hospitable. heehee.

note: the picture above reminds me of the importance of tripods and self-timers. without them, someone has to sacrifice not being in the group pic. most of the time, that someone is the owner of the camera.

Saturday, March 17, 2007

be silent, be still

"He should've said goodbye before he left"
-- from the K-series, Full House

you tenacious little fighter, you have to stop being difficult. otherwise, this just might be where we part ways.

do not ask me for him anymore. i've done more than enough to help your cause. i already let you have your way. do not ask me to do more.

you are one great heart but he doesn't feel you.

the sooner you believe that and the sooner you accept that you will never ever be his priority, the better for my sanity you will be.


argh. kakasabi ko lang na tumigil ka na. gud lak na lang sa 'yo.

FOR SALE: one foolish heart. too tenacious for my own good.

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

new 7 on 07.07.07

"Any emotion, if it is sincere, is involuntary."
--Mark Twain

of the seven wonders of the ancient world, only the pyramids of giza, egypt remain standing to this day. all the rest had been lost to fire or earthquake.

this year, on july 7, 2007, a new list of seven wonders of the world will be revealed in lisbon, portugal. currently, 21 man-made treasures have the potential to be included in the big 7 list.

the selection of the new 7 wonders of the world is in its final phase and the "biggest global vote ever to have taken place" is on!

out of the 21 structures officially listed, here are what i believe should be part of the big list...

the pyramids of giza (2600-2500 B.C.).
"testimony to perfection in art and design, never subsequently achieved. the pyramids are the purest of constructions, built for eternity. they reflect the greatest human dream of all - immortality & eternity!"

as the "oldest and only ancient wonder still standing", the pyramids of giza, egypt deserve their own place in the new list. thoughts of all the efforts put into their construction alone awe me. if i put side to side the design, environmental conditions, and level of technological advancement during the time they were built and how they actually turned out (they still stand to this day!!!), the first word that comes to my mind is this: mindblowing.

i hope i get to see them with my own two eyes someday soon.

angkor wat (12th century)
"the most important monument of the south-east asian khmer empire and the world’s largest sacred temple. it is noted for its intricate ornamentation and striking beauty"

i've never been there (or maybe i should say: actually, i've never been anywhere outside of my own country) but i've long admired the angkor wat of cambodia in the pictures. i find its over-all appearance very unique and visually arresting. it's the one structure in south-east asia which i'm very interested to see.

i would happily have my picture taken with it as a background.

easter island statues (10th-16th century)
"collection of enormous stone sculptures which have long fascinated the world and endowed the island with a mythical atmosphere"

if i had not read about these statues last year and relied only on the information provided by the new7wonders site, i wouldn't be compelled to include the easter island statues in my list. BUT these huge stone sculptures known as moai got my attention last year when my lab buddy introduced me to them and why they're interesting.

25-meter high moai are found standing around the perimeter of chile's easter island. there are so many of them and they are all monolithic, that is, every stone structure was carved out of a single piece of huge stone. why they were made is a puzzle to archeologists and historians. their positions on the island are quite intriguing. even more intriguing is how the moai were transported from the quarry where they were formed to their respective positions. according to write-ups, depending on the size of the finished moai, about 50-100 people (whoa!!!) are needed to transport a single moai.

the easter island statues are quite an accomplishment of the early inhabitants of the island. the answers to why they took the pains of making enormous stone sculptures and even transported them to long distances, the world might never really know. their monumental structures stand to this day and speak of their dedication.

if ever i'd find myself in easter island, i'd stand next to a moai. for sure, i would be too small.

the great wall of china (220 B.C and 1368 - 1644 A.D.)
"the largest man-made monument ever to have been built"

i can only think of the back-breaking work and the very long time it took to build this structure...

...and the fact that it still stands.

machu picchu (15th century)
"extraordinary settlement halfway up the andes plateau, deep in the amazon jungle, and above urubamba river. this incan city remained 'lost' for over three centuries until it was rediscovered in 1911"

in the old civilization, there were incas, mayans, and aztecs. the machu picchu of peru is the lost city of the incas and it showcases the classic inca architectural style. walls were made from blocks of stone cut so perfectly and made to fit tightly without mortar (talk about precision and genius!!!). it is an entire city situated high up in the mountains and a picture of admirable architectural feat.

i want to see this UNESCO world heritage site.

stonehenge (3000 B.C. - 1600 B.C.)
"a truly amazing feat of engineering. it is not clear who built it and for what purpose"

for me, the stonehenge in amesbury, united kingdom is as interesting as the moai of easter island, chile. in order to make this monument, builders dealt with stones weighing approximately 50 tons each. exactly how and why? i don't know, too. i was born just yesterday.

whether it's a temple, an astronomical observatory or a sacred burial site or all three, the configuration of the structure is interesting. it's not a product of child's play.

the acropolis of athens (450 - 330 B.C.)
"built atop the "sacred rock" of athens, the temples of the acropolis have become some of the most famous architectural landmarks of ancient and modern history"

the acropolis of athens, greece is an existing testimony to the glory that was greece.

taj mahal (1630 A.D.)
"regarded as the most perfect jewel of muslim art in india"

it's so grand. it looks very beautiful and very polished. it's so hard to believe that it's actually a mausoleum. the dead wife for whom this was built's so lucky.

i hope more than half of my bets will make it to the new 7 list on 07.07.07. if you really counted, you'd notice that i chose 8. ;-)

how about you, care to share your own chosen 7 out of the given 21?

note: the philippines' banaue rice terraces didn't make it to the list of top 77. it's one of the UNESCO world heritage sites though -- to be more specific, it is an endangered world heritage site.

Monday, March 12, 2007

i think i got it bad... again

"Fool me once, shame on you.
Fool me twice, prepare to die."

play. pause. resume. increase volume. play backward 2x. play backward 4x. resume normal play. pause. water. tv food. play. increase volume. vicarious adrenaline rush.

all those episodes of prison break have successfully meddled with the normal processes of my brain. even when i go to sleep, i dream about the escape plan and the strategies involved. it's as if i'm one of them and someone's so badly after my beautiful throat.

i'm definitely addicted... and when i stop, it'll take a long time for this addiction to wear off.

knowing i have the tendency to be obsessive, i shouldn't have allowed my interests to be awakened in the first place. kriminetch.

Sunday, March 11, 2007

project 365: the fifth five

"If I promise to miss you, will you go away?"

day 21. eternal embrace. in weddings, couples vow to stay together 'til death make them part. this picture shows going the extra mile...

...even in death, two human beings from 6,000 years ago managed to stay together! their skeletal remains were found in mantua early this year.

day 22. fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of the mouth or arachibutyrophobia. you can call me ignorant but i only learned about this kind of fear today. what's more, i was surprised to find out that it has a name.

day 23. i'm not as immature as i think myself to be.

day 24. low-latent inhibition. my attention was drawn to this personality trait while watching season 1 of prison break. apparently, michael scofield has it.

a person who has low-latent inhbition (LLI) has lowered ability to filter out excess information. this causes a constant stream of incoming stimuli to the brain which may or may not prove to be good for the person who has it. in scofield's case, having the trait does him good because it makes him a genius.

a person with normal latent inhibition would look at a coin and recognize it as such and would only think of the most relevant information about it. a person with LLI would go further by noticing the details of the coin and by processing so much more other information like the minting, the material, the possible modifications, similar images, history, and so on. the barrage of information might drive a person crazy if he is not able to cope. it is hypothesized that people who possess a combo of above average intelligence and LLI have the tendency to effectively process and keep up with the constant stream of information and might as well be creative geniuses.

day 25. star wars origami sites. yes, you read that right. now, i might be able to make my own R2D2 just by folding paper.

project 365: the fifth five covers the period 03.05.07-03.09.07. updates on this project are posted here.

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

she shell

on march 21, 2005, i wrote:
this is the picture of our tandem: she’s the angel without wings. i’m the demon without the pitchfork. she represents silence. i represent noise. if she’s good, then i’m evil. if she were a jedi, i’d be a sith. people who know us can attest that we’re opposites. fortunately, we don’t really clash.

we're so different. the only things we have in common are high honors and eyebags. but those are not the reasons why we're best friends.

we're best friends because we just are!

02.18.07. with my best friend in all the world, in all the universe.

this, despite the fact that we very seldom see each other.

sure, most of the time, i'm somewhere with other people but it really doesn't matter where i am and who i'm with. wherever i find myself, whoever i'm with, whenever i'm asked who my best friend is, i only have one answer. she is.

because she truly is!

if there's one person i know whose personality radiates with genuine kindness and whose existence inspires people to believe in the possibility of world peace, that's her.

because she's such a positive influence in my life... my greatest achievement, so far, is being her best friend.

i know i've said that before but, hey, that's something worth saying again and again.

p.s. she's celebrating her birthday this week. there are many ways of greeting a person happy birthday and this is one of those. join me in saying, HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHELL!

Monday, March 05, 2007

project 365: the fourth five

"There's no man on earth who doesn't dream about getting away with a girl he loves."
-- from the K-movie, Windstruck

day 16. unfinished business. a needlework i started in 2003 is still far from being done. a quick timeline check says it's now 2007.

my poor bubbles. i swear you'll be whole soon.

day 17. it's confirmed. i am my cousin b-boy's favorite reading partner. well, we don't actually read. all we do is flip through pages of kiddie books and he asks his questions about the illustrations. he is only 1 year and 9 months old but he's so charming and good at saying "ate inday, unsa ni?," "ngano man?," and, whenever he wants to move on to another activity, "ihipos na nato ni, tapos na basa si b-boy."

day 18. cebu pacific's one-peso airfare promo is back this year! they're selling the one-peso tickets from the march 2 to march 8 only. the flight period covered is from june 1 to december 15, 2007. got a destination?

day 19. watching the binibinang pilipinas tv coverage made me realize that the hotel philippine plaza now carries the name sofitel philippine plaza. just last october i found out that the westin philippine plaza dropped westin from its name and put in its place the word hotel. little did i know then that it was to undergo another renaming... or re-branding. from westin to hotel to sofitel. by any other name, it's that posh hotel you see in the manila bay area.

day 20. attitude makes a woman or a man perfect. my father said that to no one in particular today.

p.s. project 365: the fourth five covers the period 02.28.07-03.04.07. future updates on this project will be posted here.

Friday, March 02, 2007

reel moments

"Fiction reveals truths that reality obscures."
--Jessamyn West

consider yourself warned. there are potential spoilers ahead. well, the warning's applicable only if you haven't watched the movies or seen the scenes i'm talking about in this post.

if you don't want to risk encountering any spoiler, stop reading here and just come back another day.

"big brother" moment
movie: ang pagdadalaga ni maximo oliveros
the jeepney scene with maxi crying his heart out to kuya bogs

move over, big brother of reality tv. the "big brother" award goes to kuya bogs!

kuya bogs was portrayed oh-so-well by ping medina. when kuya bogs saw maxi sad and crying, he led her into an empty public jeepney and, there, allowed the tears of her young broken heart to fall down. maxi's heartbreak was made more convincing because of that scene. kuya bogs was there to cushion the pain.

i could still remember the words he said so kindly... "tama na iyak..." i bet i'm not the only one who likes that scene a lot. maxi's envied for having a caring brother like kuya bogs.

"just chill, ok" moment
movie: reality bites
that moment of tension between leilani's BFs: michael the boyfriend and troy the jealous best friend

michael: have i stepped over some line in the sands of coolness with you? because excuse me if somebody doesn't know the secret handshake with you...

troy: there's no secret handshake. there's an IQ prerequisite, but there's no secret handshake.

ahahah. i looooove troy's reply. it's something still civil but acerbic enough. uppity actually.

"this is love" moment
movie: march of the penguins (documentary)

this. i've said this before, i'm gonna say it again: the penguin love scene is the best love scene i’ve ever seen!

"mother and son" moment
movie: the passion of the christ
the "i'm here" scene

remember that scene where the mother rushed to her son when she saw him fall on the ground one playtime? that left quite an impression on me. the scene illustrated very well the mother's love for her kid. it was on the expression on her face. it was on the way she said, "i'm here." it was on the simplicity of the scene.

i believe every mother's love is like that. it doesn't require grand gestures to be felt.

another "mother and son" moment
movie: crying ladies
the scene with stella and her son preparing for sleep

have you seen this movie? stella was portrayed by sharon cuneta. though morally weak, stella's a loving mother to her son. during their quality hours together, she and her son played and clowned around a lot. they also prayed together.

the mother and son scene in this movie that stood out for me was this hilarious sequence where stella was saying their prayer and, suddenly, the room started shaking. her neighbors who lived just a floor above her were doing it wildly and noisily. in her attempt to protect her son's peace and innocence, stella matched the shaking and the noises by saying her prayer louder and louder while hugging her son. she prayed frantically and incoherently, she invoked the lyrics of her favorite videoke song.

laugh trip.

"she broke his heart" moment
movie: casablanca
the bleeding letter scene

first, he got stood up. second, he received her goodbye. then, the rain fell. the words of his lady-love got smeared. very heartbreaking!

rick blaine waited for ilsa at the train station. she didn't come. his friend, sam, came and handed him a letter. it said what it said. i love you, goodbye. you know, that kind of thing.

the sadness of the moment got doubled because the rain fell and the raindrops caused the farewell note to bleed.

"mean girl" moment
movie: mean girls
sugar and spice, think twice when she's being nice

regina george, the high school queen bee, saw lea edwards wearing a skirt. she blurted out, "oh my god, i love your skirt! where did you get it?"

thrilled that regina liked her skirt, lea answered, "it was my mom's, in the '80s."

regina said, "ah, vintage! so adorable."

lea was doubly thrilled so she thanked regina. when lea was already out of earshot, regina, in her mean girl tone, announced to her friends, "that is the ugliest effing skirt i've ever seen."

haha. mean girl, indeed.

moment of truth
movie: pirates of the caribbean: the curse of the black pearl
captain jack sparrow living up to his character

captain jack sparrow: me? i'm dishonest and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. honestly, it's the honest ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly... stupid.

captain jack sparrow and his run-on sentences and confusing sensible statements. savvy?
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