"a caterpillar doesn't just grow into a butterfly. a caterpillar must undergo metamorphosis, and a cocoon is where a caterpillar risks it all: enters total chaos, undergoes total rebuilding, and is born to a new way of living. only in taking the risk of entering that inert cocoon can the caterpillar go from dormancy to potency, from ugliness to beauty."

Monday, January 28, 2008

'not going anywhere good'

"People choose the paths that gain them the greatest rewards for the least amount of effort -- that's a law of nature --
and you defied that."

-- Dr. Gregory House of House, MD

'not going anywhere good'

had i affirmed that phrase, had i believed in it, it would have held true.

BUT never did i and never will i.

i examined the basis and found it wanting.

i have learned to choose the words i take to be true -- not out of juvenile denial but out of wisdom. i will believe only those that are worth affirming. a negative phrase like that, when left unchecked and unopposed, can snowball. words, after all, are powerful.

imagine if i had no mind of my own. if i bought that phrase hook, line, and sinker, i would have allowed myself to be irreversibly tricked of and robbed of a meaning, and i would have been sent running away from my life's path.

i guess, in my case, defiance is a gift. i am carrying on with the road i was left with because i still believe in it. without wax.

it is mine to care for and live for. it is something i often prayed i could tirelessly fight for.

just because it is a rough road it does not mean that it is not the right path. there are surprises to be had and blessings are poured on those who have the courage to labor for them, thereby, deserving them. the best fruits of the path are revealed only to those who dare not turn their back when blocked with obstacle after obstacle after obstacle. faith has its rewards, unwavering faith moreso.

to you who said it, it's been awhile but i am pretty sure our paths will cross again... soon. don't take that as a threat.

it's an invitation.

Sunday, January 20, 2008


"Each forward step we take
we leave some phantom of ourselves behind."

--John Lancaster Spalding

i just remembered that i've been given an assignment by one of my fellow bloggers. i'm supposed to share seven things about me. now that i remember, i also recall (yeah, i'm being redundant, so?) that some months back, one of my classmates from high school who discovered the joys of blogging last year also gave me the task of sharing eight things about myself.

so, there's seven. there's eight. howell, if bloggin' means spillin'... gosh. two years ago, i was asked to share twenty random things about myself. shortly after that, i shared another twenty out of whim. double gosh.

right now, i don't really know what to share. i'll just try to ramble on and see just how many i could come up with this time.

1. it's been over a year since i last actively participated in a drinking session. december 30, 2006 was the last day and since then, except for red wine on special occasions, i've been alcohol-free!

my friends have started calling me KJ (read: killjoy) but i'm proud i haven't budged... yet! (hehehehe.) actually, it feels great being able to say 'no' everytime someone offers me a bottle... or even a can... or a mere glass. how far i can take this resolve, i don't know. for now, should anyone persistently insist on making me glug again, i'll also persistently talk my way out of it.

2. it's been over a month since i got my design-it-yourself starbucks tumbler but until now, i haven't given it my own design. i've been taking it with me every workday -- to batangas and laguna (since i report to both places everyday, how's that? i'm a supergurl!) -- and, from time to time, i stare at it thinking when i would see my own creativity reflected on its sides.

i already have a concept in mind. all i need to do is to implement it. sure, i'll need will, too. for now, my starbucks tumbler houses my water. coffee? nah... i hardly drink coffee. but yeah, yeah, it will house coffee -- on rare occasions -- only after i've put my design.

3. i'm still addicted to naruto. i'm into shippuden now. during my last night-out with the p6peeps last weekend, i was barely into our dance revo challenge-slash-craze because i was concentrating more on my doses of naruto shippuden. thanks to my friend jerk's collection and to edson's laptop!

yesterday, i got myself my very own collection of naruto shippuden! nik, are you reading this? hehehee...

4. i'm wondering when i'll be able to see sweeney todd. johnny depp, hello! i was supposed to watch it this weekend but... "but" circumstances do happen, don't they?

5. by currently living on my own and alone in my own balay-balay (as mae -- she's my earth angel here in laguna -- would call it), i'm living up to my surname. (heeheehee.)

i may be on my own BUT i am far from being lonely out here in sta. rosa. during workdays, i have the company of my new-found-friends-slash-workmates and on weekends, i either join my old-time friends in manila (or wherever) or, on rare weekends like this weekend, i get to explore laguna on my own. the set-up feeds my adventurous spirit (and promotes my independence)!

plus fresh air, cool breeze, lots of natural greens, peaceful community... the environment here is really a far cry from metro manila's stressful hustle-bustle.

6. [i decided to erase what i originally wrote for this item.]

Saturday, January 19, 2008

beautiful people...

"Turn your face to the sun and the shadows fall behind you."
--Maori Proverb

...cast beautiful shadows

...deserve a marvelous sunset

...make an awesome photo even more awesome!


more importantly, beautiful people...

...make a big happy family!
(eventhough quite a number have already migrated, we're still that many :P)

the first three photos are courtesy of
albert who took photos of me and my friends while we were out savoring 2007's last sunset in our hometown.

Thursday, January 03, 2008

chasing the last sunset of 2007

"In the right light, at the right time,
everything is extraordinary."

--Aaron Rose

12.31.2007: bidding bye to a year that was...

i spent the last week of 2007 practically sprinting from here to there and spent the first day of 2008 in a similar way. whew! you can say "LAAGAN!" and i'd just chuckle.

i was still in tangub city with my family when one of my awesome friends -- sealdz -- sent out an invitation to watch 2007's last sunset in OUR iligan. knowing i'd be back just in time, i said yes to the invitation... and la daaa daaaaaaa... swish swish flick! just take a look at the photo album i published in multiply to get glimpses of what i and a few of my hometown-slash-great friends said yes to! it's quite a year-end special.

the wonderful sunset experience was made even better because somebody -- a stranger to us -- approached us and asked if he could take pictures of our group. since it was a dslr nikon camera that we saw him cradling, we didn't dare refuse and we became instant models!

we had fun with the point-and-shoot cameras that we brought with us. we had more fun when somebody aimed his dslr cam at us and the sunset.

actually, with the sunset-painted sky as our oh-so-natural backdrop, only our shadows could be seen in the fantastic shots... but they were such fantastic shots! they'll definitely find their way to our respective friendster (& whatever) pages once we get hold of our own copies.

by the way, ENJOY 2008!
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